Articles for the Month of December 2012

… We got it!

We may get snow Christmas eve and day… It was 17 deg… this morning, the sky is blue and the sun is out… Time for some hot chocolate.

… What brings you joy?

 List the top 9 things that bring you joy.

mama kats

What brings you joy?

What a fantastic question at such an amazing time of year!

1- My Children

(The Tall – The Smalls – The Tiniest of all!)

2- Mr. Amazing

(Unless he lets a chicken hawk eat my kittens)

3- Love – In all of its amazing forms

(Friends – Family – Pets)

4- Art – In all of its amazing forms

(Photography – Paintings- Music)

5 -Being Alive- Nothing more or less.

(Everything is perfect)

6- The look of Christmas lights

(and the smell of chimney smoke on a winter night)

7- My sense of humour

( :) – My Blog! )

8- Hitting the lights green on the way home

(Finding joy in simple things)

9- Wildflowers

(Seeing birds flying and the sun beaming down)

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… are you saying you want me to take “your” journalistic integrity and shove it up “my” ___ ?

 me:  (Linked this picture)kitten
Mr. Amazing:  cute
 me:  lol
 me:  LMAO!
 me:  Its cute… shiney and silver
Mr. Amazing: We are still talking about the speaker, yes?
 me:  Yes – LOL Bratface
Mr. Amazing:  You can play music to it right from your iPad wirelessly
 me:  Dont talk to me anymore LOL
Mr. Amazing:  And… I can get it through my work for only $95
 me:  If I can only have one cat, you can only have one speaker… go home and mark your favorite… Im throwing the rest out the window
Mr. Amazing:  lol
 me:  I loooovvveee you
Mr. Amazing:  I love you too, If you want to call the landlord… I am sure that would be a super fun conversation
 me:  They would never even notice!
Mr. Amazing: and watch this be the kitten that urinates on EVERYTHING, What is that lovely smell in your home, is that… cat urine, yummy
 me:  You think EVERY cat pees on everything LOL more don’t pee on things than do!
Mr. Amazing:  That’s because every other cat I have owned pees on everything, pee pee pee pee
 me:  How many have you owned LMAO!
Mr. Amazing:  3
 me:  I have owned a bazzillion… and flora was the only one who did that..
Mr. Amazing:  Yeah… well
Mr. Amazing:  I am happy with two animals, a cat, a dog
 me:  Me too, I just like to mess with you
Mr. Amazing:  done
 me:  and I love kittens
Mr. Amazing:  yeah… that’s all this is, you like to mess with me
 me:  Kittens are like babies, My friends get one, and I get kitten hungry LOL I dont really want one
Mr. Amazing:  lol -you really don’t want one? So if I brought a kitten home tonight you would turn it away, cuz you really don’t want one
 me:  Oh hell no, I would snatch that kitten up and kiss the shit out of it
Mr. Amazing:  I want to cry a little bit just thinking about a kitten peeing in the closet and climbing up my back while I am screaming obscenities
(this is a memory, FYI)
 me:  LMAO! Its going to happen one day, I am content with that for now
Mr. Amazing: I honest to god think you like tormenting my subconscious brain
 me:  ROTFLMAO!
Mr. Amazing:  you don’t like this? <twist>
 me:  I told you up front, remember, I would ALWAYS own a cat
 Mr. Amazing:  I told you I would always own a chicken hawk, but I let that dream die
 me:  ROTFLMAO!!!
 me:  Im sure the kids would LOVE one!
Mr. Amazing::  Do you see the picture of it eating the kitten, uh… I mean small squirrel
 me:  WHAT? No! You wouldnt send me a picture of that! <looking again>
 me:  Mother Fucker
Mr. Amazing:  Meow
 me:  You know… Pissing you off is the only thing that stops me from bringing one home…. And suddenly the keeping you happy thing seems alot less appealing
 me:  Im Blogging this… people will mail me Kittens in protest!
Mr. Amazing:   It will arrive in a package dead, and I can feed it to a chicken hawk – tell them that if they send you kittens to at least put holes in the box
 me:  Your going to hell…. which will include cat nip treats dangling over your boy parts in a room full of kittens
 Mr. Amazing:  boy parts?
 me:  uh huh
Mr. Amazing:   what am I five?
 me:  ROTFL!
Mr. Amazing:   you just typed that I want that to sink in
 me:  I am DYING over here! I typed it because I knew I was going to blog it!
Mr. Amazing:   that seems counter-intuitive, shouldn’t you blog it because you typed it? Where is your journalistic integrity?
 me:  Bet if it was up your… other part… you would know
Mr. Amazing:   are you saying you want me to take “your” journalistic integrity and shove it up “my” ass?
 me:  YES!

… Santa Baby

Dear Santa…

Without sounding like I am accusing you of doubting my goodness… I feel it is important to point out some of my finer qualities… because lets face it… My Christmas list is not small… and nothing short of cliche…. I would have to point out that I have been good this year… I have helped where I can… I have been a regular bundle of sunshine when people are down… I go to work… I work hard… I come home and I cook dinner… and I clean house… fold laundry…. scrub toilets…. attend recitals… drive carpool… make chamomile tea before bed… I love… my god do I have the love thing down… I love my children…Mr. Amazing…  others children… my childrens children… my friends… some of my family… I could go on… I have references…

I am no saint … this much I know… I have thrown my share of hissy fits… I have melted down over plenty of “1st world problems” … I have lost my temper… lost my patience… not returned a promised phone call… forgotten a birthday…. but I do try…

What I want this year for Christmas is breathing room… I would like a little more time between each challenge… Money to last a little longer… I am grateful ends meet… just a little less barely…. I would like a few less coughs… and a few less tears… a trip to disneyland… only in america can I flog myself and my parenting skills for never having gotten my son there… I know … I know it is wrong… when I have so much to wish it… but I do dammit… Im not done either… I wish for peaceful sleepful nights…. less nightmares… I wish for less debt… less instability… I wish for more time in the sunshine… more time with my little family… more laughter… and a kitten… Mr. Amazing says I cant have one… that one cat is enough… and I dont want anything to take my shadow cat away… I would like you to convince him…. and more than anything… more that anything I have asked for prior to this… I want all these things for others… Give my kitten to some little girl that has never had something of her very own… and give my comforts to someone who doesnt know what it is like to make ends meet… even barely… Give my less coughs to kids that dont have a mom to take care of them… and give my sunshine to those who dont have the freedom to run in it as often as we do… because honestly no matter how much you have… it is never enough…Capture Kony… Stop Assad… There is so much more wrong that I could add… fix it… make the hurting stop…. and please… Let me have DisneyLand

 

Merry Christmas You Guys!!!

 

I threw a wish in the well… Don’t ask me… I’ll never tell

I know I know… The prompt said a song I love… But this song isn’t necessarily my theme song of the week… or month… in fact it gets stuck in my head and wraps itself in there until everything I am doing (Walking, talking, dancing, doing dishes… washing in the shower ha!) gets done in rhythm. 

Smallest child sings it everywhere… We sing it together at the top of our lungs while grocery shopping… we dance to it in the car… I sing it to Small child and Mr. Amazing just to hear their groans of disbelief that yet again it is going to be stuck in their heads…

My Christian (its his name… and his spiritual belief all wrapped up in one) bemoans it … and I post yet another MEME on his wall quoting it

My Day Job (The place I go to earn a living… while I wait to be discovered and become a renowned… well anything) did a cover of it with all kinds of cheesy dance moves… some including a forklift… and so I bring to you… Call me Maybe!

I threw a wish in the well,
Don’t ask me, I’ll never tell
I looked to you as it fell,
And now you’re in my way

Are there even real wells anymore? Okay, I am sure there are! But not anywhere I have been. and she’s not a princess in a Disney movie, She is no Snow White.

I’d trade my soul for a wish,
Pennies and dimes for a kiss

I don’t know the value of a soul, But I am willing to bet it is worth more than a wish for a kiss… you’re sounding a bit easy

I wasn’t looking for this,
But now you’re in my way

What do you mean you weren’t looking for this? All you have done is sing about looking for this! Did you forget?

Hey, I just met you,
And this is crazy,
But here’s my number,
So call me, maybe?

Uhhhh From a wishing well to a cheap bar? okay.. Im with you… no… no I am not

It’s hard to look right,
At you baby,
But here’s my number,
So call me, maybe?

It’s hard to look right at him? What is he? Someone has been drinking from the crazy sauce

And all the other boys,
Try to chase me,
But here’s my number,
So call me, maybe?

Other boys are chasing you… But you want the one you cannot stand to look at? Daddy Issues

You took your time with the call,
I took no time with the fall
You gave me nothing at all,
But still, you’re in my way

He gave you nothing and he’s in your way… in your way of what exactly? This makes so little sense I want to punch you in the face

Hey, I just met you,
And this is crazy,
But here’s my number,
So call me, maybe?

That’s it! I’m sick of this maybe business… Do you want him to call you or not? This relationship has so much drama before it’s even begun… I hope he never calls you because the break up song for this will be UNBEARABLE! (Taylor Swift get to writing it! Pronto!)