The Leprechauns have landed!

 

Well the year had finally come that St. Patricks Day fell on a day that smallest child was at her Mom’s for the holiday… I knew last year it was coming so I put in a little extra effort into the prank until the St. Patricks Day eve was upon us and we got a tearful call from that co-parent… She hadn’t realized how much smallest child was looking forward to it… smallest child could be heard in the background screaming “If there is no Leprechauns, then there is no Santa, no Easter Bunny, no Tooth Fairy… ” and so on… we thought she had reached the age of not believing and treated her accordingly… only to realize at the last moment that she might still need/want to believe… we figured it out when she was berating her Mom with lines such as “You are ruining my childhood!” … Soooo what is any stepmother supposed to do that has created this monster? I put in a quick call on the Leprechaun line… they managed to pull off a miracle… and her childhood was saved!

They tiptoed outside her Moms apartment... sneaking up to her car... as it was too late to get into the abode.

They tiptoed outside her Moms apartment… sneaking up to her car… as it was too late to get into the abode.

They busted into the car in a flurry of green glitter and shamrock confetti!

They busted into the car in a flurry of green glitter and shamrock confetti!

They left their wisely worded note...

They left their wisely worded note…

And goodies for the wee lass... including her half sister... the wee-er lass

And goodies for the wee lass… including her half sister… the wee-er lass

And that is the story of how we saved St. Patricks Day

And that is the story of how St. Patricks Day was saved!

1508101_10205108263458509_4663964267304022180_n

Tall Child was not forgotten in all of this… he was rewarded with gold coins of his own for his help in the Leprechaun Miracle

 

(You may want to visit our Leprechauns past visits… they are quite evil)

I have had people bemoan my Leprechaun Loyalty in the past… there was the one year a wee lass at school didn’t believe in my smalls Leprechauns

So we helped her build a trap (actually a house because she was afraid of hurting them)

So we helped her build a trap (actually a house because she was afraid of hurting them) The Leprechauns broke into her house (They may have known where the key was hidden and played… quite messily in their kitchen and left some treats!)

And if that is a bit of the stretch from the original prompt I apologize … But you can’t talk about being tricked without a little Leprechaun story!

Writing Prompt :A Time I Was Tricked

Writing Prompt :A Time I Was Tricked

Smelly Cat…

Inadvertently capturing my step small and myself… while capturing my curious cat. Also- I need to clean my mirror.

Smelly Cat

Drink. Drank. Drunk…

This public display of drunkenness and debauchery is dedicated to Mama Kats World Famous Writing Prompts! “Write a blog post inspired by the word: Drunk”

mama kats

1

2

3

4

 

THE END

A Year in Review….

mama kats

The prompt was compile a list of best posts and photos from the last year… So instead I compiled a list of posts about my favorite pictures! Check them out!

12 Reasons I Love My Life

January 2014 – From the Front Porch

February 2014 – Sometimes being me is pretty damn cool

March 2014 – I found the Tardis!

April 2014 – Holi Festival of Colors

May 2014 – and once again… Painted Angels

June 2014 – This Day

July 2014 – Wishing for a more relaxing time

August 2014 – I raised these...

September 2014 - Star Lord… Maybe you’ve heard of me

October 2014 – The Toy Room Collection

November 2014 – Short People Got No Reason!

December 2014 – His first date

2015

Well… The New Year brought me something a little unexpected… unexpected because I forgot about it… It brought me a several hundred dollar charge to my bank account… One not budgeted and one I am going to have to tighten the belt on our budget to cover… for something that I seemed to have lost my passion for… for something that had become an after thought… it started to feel like a task… and nobody cared if I did it or not… and I discovered other ways to keep my head from imploding with all the words I pour out here… Yes… Here… Smiffbib.com… My Domain renewed for another 3 years automatically… 3 Years! Can you believe it? I have been writing here for 3 years… I sat and thought for a few moments about what I had accomplished here… and the resounding answer was… NOT A DAMN THING!… and I chuckled to myself because… well… what did I ever hope to accomplish here… this blog is like that seinfeld comedy show… it is about nothing… and I never hoped to accomplish anything more than that… Well… That much was a success…. What has the last 3 years brought me… My new husband (Mr. Amazing) bought me Smiffbib as a gift… we have been through some of the most amazing adventures… trials… illnesses… deaths… all of those thoughts and been poured out into here… hidden in the craziest stories… silly pictures… one self discovery after another… all of the smalls milestones … every fear… every dark corner of depression… every broken thought… Pictures of Disneyland… screams of frustration at the tea party passing bills about my vagina… buried my first grandchild… my exhusband/sons father… and others so close to me…

One day I am going to write something so life changing that people will quote me… they will say Smiffbib and people will know what that means… Or not.

Last year at this time I thought I would be somewhere completely different than I am now… and that was my resolution.

Did you know how far you can come inside yourself without any external changes? Did you know how much you could be okay inside yourself no matter what kind of chaos is carrying on around you?

I have no idea what this new year will bring… none… I have no idea where I will be the next time this domain is up for renewal… I hope I have as much to say about them as I have this last three… Mr. Amazing just called me from the office.. He transferred the money into my bank account… he told me to stop worrying… I could keep Smiffbib… so I suppose I will have somewhere to record them all…

Soooo... I guess it is time to get out of this bed... and begin the new year.

Soooo… I guess it is time to get out of this bed… and begin the new year.

Shout out to my favorite writing group of all time… and Kats prompt for getting me all resolutiony today… I have written 464 posts… here is to another couple hundred more.

mama kats

Top 5 Embarrassing Moments….

mama kats List your top 5 embarrassing moments

Ha ha… well I have been in a bit of a self loathing mode lately… public humiliation seems to be a great way to round that off… I am a blogger because I have an endless supplies of stories to tell… and below is some of my best material that I have yet to turn into posts… one day I will do each of these things justice… these are probably not the most embarrassing… they are just what came to mind first… and they are not in any kind of chronological order… and are not ordered by the amount of embarrassment experienced… they are simply spilt out into the keyboard to make us all feel better about ourselves today… No matter where I am today… I am not in any of the places below… and for that I am grateful

1- Making Amends with the Barricade

I have shared the story about the time I almost blew up the kitchen… and that I didn’t understand how a vacuum worked… I dont often talk about what happened to get me in that halfway house… and I still wont… but I will say that something I decided to do whilst living there was make amends for some horrible things I had done… and I made some phone calls and I wrote some letters… and I took responsibility for my part of things… and I let go of things that weren’t mine… Oddly… one said thing was a barricade… you know the kind… Orange and white striped… flashing round light on top… I found the owner of Greenes construction company and returned the apartment decor I had been hauling around for about a year… Yeah.. That happened

2- “It gives me hope… and you cant put a price on hope”

28 years old… haven just given birth to my son… I lost 100 pounds.. ironically I had more to lose… and did not… also I gained about half of that back… but not before I starred in a weight loss commercial that aired on latenight TV for years for the supplement I used to help me… I would show it here… but I torched every copy of it in existence… Ever wonder about those ladies on the commercials? That happened.

3- Only 1 OSHA recordable that year…

I was on the safety committee for the company I worked for at the time… I flew to chicago for two weeks for training… at which point I was informed we had only one osha recordable that year… Some girl in Salt Lake City had fallen down a man hole…. unbeknownst to the trainer.. I was that girl… unfortunately… it was not unbeknownst to my colleagues… totally happened.

4- Ohhh There he is! do you want a mirror so you can see his head?

“IF YOU CAN SEE HIS HEAD… THEN YOU CAN GET HIM OUT OF ME… PULL HIM OUT!”

I could not make this shit up.

5 – Let’s do the timewarp again

During my divorce… I struggled alot… sometimes I drank those struggles away… One time I drank them and rallied my entire mormon neighborhood at 4 am to do the TimeWarp on my front lawn….

Some other time remind me to tell you the story about the time I camped out on Robert Englund’s lawn until he asked me to leave… I have a thing for Freddy…

krueger

Why yes… That is Stan Lee…

Comic Con was panic inducing… There were so many people there you couldn’t move… couldn’t breathe…. I hid against the back of the convention center most of the time… but these pics look like we had a grand time! So let us go with that!

DrWho Freddy

stanlee

Today… We be Pirates!

I purchased it because my porch has a flag holder…. and well… that meant I needed a flag…. my cute nieces found it in the closet this weekend and asked why I had it and I told them when I was feeling adventurous… I post it outside…. so OFCOURSE we had to fly it immediately.

20140809_112741

I posted about Robin Williams (Who played Peter Pan in Hook) Monday… and I have been reading so much of the conversations his death has given life too… The most common theme is that he felt alone… or that he was selfish… or any other number of misconceptions about suicide…. A good friend posted this on Facebook last night and it made everything come into perspective for me on the topic… I hope someone reads this and it helps

When it comes to suicide the late David Foster Wallace said it so exquisitely and prophetically…“The so-called ‘psychotically depressed’ person who tries to kill herself doesn’t do so out of quote ‘hopelessness’ or any abstract conviction that life’s assets and debits do not square. And surely not because death seems suddenly appealing. The person in whom Its invisible agony reaches a certain unendurable level will kill herself the same way a trapped person will eventually jump from the window of a burning high-rise. Make no mistake about people who leap from burning windows. Their terror of falling from a great height is still just as great as it would be for you or me standing speculatively at the same window just checking out the view; i.e. the fear of falling remains a constant. The variable here is the other terror, the fire’s flames: when the flames get close enough, falling to death becomes the slightly less terrible of two terrors. It’s not desiring the fall; it’s terror of the flames. And yet nobody down on the sidewalk, looking up and yelling ‘Don’t!’ and ‘Hang on!’, can understand the jump. Not really. You’d have to have personally been trapped and felt flames to really understand a terror way beyond falling.”