UPDATE: BAHAHAHA! I Apologize in advance to writing this post that every one of you that googles Outer Space and gets brought here… Its getting a TON of traffic… But I know this isn’t quite what you had in mind!

I almost feel like I should put a disclaimer on here… But I decided against it :)

Mr Amazing:  It’s all because of the coca cola flavored Slurpee… choose the form of the destructor…..

 me:  I’m going to live forever… because God hates me… That’s my retirement plan

Mr Amazing:  Uh… hello God has a plan, you can only live (or die) if you are part of Gods plan

 me:  I choose neither

Mr Amazing:  then you will live forever in death or die forever in life – Not sure which

 me:  OUTER DARKNESS! Okay seriously… how cool does that sound… where are you? OUTER DARKNESS!

Mr Amazing:  outer darkness sounds horrible, it’s like being Helen Keller

 me:  How is it any scarier sounding than outer space? I think that perhaps that is what they were referring too… if you don’t get to go to heaven… You float around in space

Mr Amazing:  well, you can’t live in outer space

 me:  bumping asteroids and stuff

Mr Amazing:  nope it is complete and total loneliness with no senses

 me:  If Kolob is a planet

Mr Amazing: no touch, sight, sound, etc

 me:  Outer Darkness is Outer Space… its logical

Mr Amazing:  maybe it is being stuck in a black hole

 me:  Maybe… Either way… it doesn’t sound that bad… and all the coke flavored candy will be there…

Mr Amazing:  living forever with only your own thoughts sounds lovely?

 me:  Have you met me?  It sounds fantastic!

Mr Amazing:  you obviously don’t understand Mormon theology

no senses

no taste

no smell

no touch

no sight

no sound

 me:  No, You obviously don’t understand my brain… It would be like Disneyland

Mr Amazing:  you would be screaming and you couldn’t even hear yourself scream

 me:  My thoughts alone are the equivalent of the Matterhorn

Mr Amazing::  if such a place existed

 me:  Why would I be screaming? Nothing would be hurting me… cant feel anything!

Mr Amazing:  because you would go mad

 me:  Would it be claustrophobic? or big like outer darkness sounds?

Mr Amazing:  you wouldn’t be able to tell

 me:  Then it wouldn’t matter

Mr Amazing:  You would go completely insane within days

 me:  I bet I could hold out longer than you

Mr Amazing:  I would last minutes ROFL

 me:  I think it sounds like a vacation


Dedicated to Tolman… And her children who really know how to end a conversation

Mom: “Em, what do you want mama to make for your birthday dinner tomorrow night?”

Em: “I want to go to Las Vegas!”

Mom: “A little out of my price range, my dear little diva!”

Em: “Okay, mac n cheese.”


Noel: <snort!>
Mom: That’s disgusting! I knew someone who got fired for doing that!
Noel: What did they do when they got fired?
Mom: They cried!
Nikolas: Waaa! <snort!> Waaa! <snort!> Waaa! <snort!>


Nana to Noel: “When is your audition for ‘Annie’?”

Nikolas: “Tomorrow! Tomorrow!”


Em: Guess what Noel! We had a sleep over at my dads… Mom slept in his bed!

Mom: <Silence>

Em: Mom you didn’t bring your Pajamas!

Mom: Look <pointing out the window> Horses!!

The family is eating pizza… Minding their own business…

Mom: Hey dad (Grandpa) i have a question for you.

Steve: <Jumps in being funny> Where do babies come from?…

Noel: from a penis! <She was 3>